The other day when I was talking to my mom on the phone, she mentioned that she didn’t know that parents tucked their kids in at night until she was an adult and saw it on TV. How sad! She said that she decided then and there that she would tuck her kids in at night and tell them she loved them. How sweet.
Then she asked, “do you remember that I tucked you into bed when you were a kid?”
Now, I have a bad memory, something that saddens me. I didn’t want to say no and make my mom feel bad but I didn’t want to say yes either. It kinda just caught be off guard. I tried to recall being tucked in but couldn’t, not right on the spot like that. I told her that she knows I have a bad memory and that I’m not sure if I remember. 🙁 I regret saying that and have tried to think back in my memory ever since then.
I remember my mom would always and still does do anything and everything she can possibly do for her kids. I remember how she made us a home cooked meal every night of the week – a real home cooked meal. I remember being able to talk to her about anything. I remember having fun with her. I remember how my friends would always want to go to my house because my mom would talk with them, joke around with them, feed them, and make them feel at home. I remember friends saying they wished their mom was like my mom. My mom has always been there for me, always. I just couldn’t remember her tucking me in and it made me sad.
I took for granted how good I had it as a kid with 2 parents who would do anything for them and with them. We spent a lot of time together as a family. My dad was a pastor for a small denomination which meant we moved every couple years. This meant that family was more important than ever, we were all we had when we moved to a new city – no aunts, uncles, cousins, or grandparents and certainly no friends. We leaned on each other quite a bit when we moved to a new place and got settled in. But even more so, my parents always let us kids be involved even in game night with the adults when other parents would leave their kids at home. We did everything together – and still do – as much as we can since the pandemic erupted. Now, we do family chats on Facebook about once a day. But I miss not seeing everyone in person – haven’t seen them since February of last year – because they had the flu before the pandemic started!
The other day I was telling my son what my mom asked me about being tucked in. He said, “Mom, you didn’t say no, did you??” Oh, I felt so bad, even more so. Why didn’t I just lie? Then, it popped. It popped into my head the feeling of being tucked in! Oh, that glorious feeling of being tightly tucked in with the blankets tucked in under me on all sides. That comforting feeling. I remembered giggles. I remembered the feeling of contentment. I just didn’t remember the act of the tucking in.
It made me realize that I do things just like my mom and how proud I am of that. I’ve always tucked my kids in at night when they were little and still say goodnight, give them a hug, kiss, pray with, and tell them I love them. I let them know that I’m their biggest fan, that in all the world that I would always choose them as my kids, and how blessed I feel that God has entrusted them into my care – the last few things I don’t bombard with them every night, but often. I want my kids to know and feel loved and cared for now and their entire lives.
So, when my mom say that TV show as a newly married adult and committed to always tucking in her kids, it spiraled into so much more. It spiraled into being a great mom to me all my years and taught me how to love and care for my own kids. Hopefully one day, my kids will remember the little conversations we had at bedtime and hopefully they feel just as loved and safe as I felt growing up. Hopefully, that same love will be passed down to their children. And hopefully, they have a better memory than their mom! But, all in all, I hope my kids always know that they are loved by their parents, by God, and their whole family. That’s what it’s all about, right? Being a parent is all about giving children love and care, no matter what.
So, yes, Mom, my whole being remembers being tucked in at night when I was a kid because it developed me into who I am as a person and as a mom today. I love you, Mom.
Do you tuck your kids in at night? Were you tucked in as a child?